Web Trends in 2010

1) Employee-owned IT
Traditionally, IT departments decide what kind of computers and software employees use and they take responsibility for all maintenance chores. Younger workers, however, have grown up choosing their own computers and applications and want to keep their personalized computing styles. Enter employee-owned IT, which sees workers bringing their own computers to work so that IT can lock them down with virtualization or multiple operating systems that deliver security. IT departments save as maintenance devolves to computer vendors, while employees swear they are more productive using a machine of their choice.

2) Web Analytics as part of Enterprise BI and Dashboards.
Web Analytics in many organizations is still an orphan with no real parents. Every department looks at its data but rarely does it get a strategic priority as an indicator of business trends and business intelligence asset. Investment in web analytics allows for customer insights, marketing spend ROI, conversion optimization and can impact the bottom line. As companies invest in sophisticated BI and analytical dashboards, web based data that is not transactional is usually not there. Integrating web traffic and user interest data into these systems can result in new insights and better actionable data.

3) Approaching Social Networking and Collaboration in a Strategic way
Everyone now realizes the power of social networks and is rushing to get in, establish a FaceBook page, a Twitter account and get’s their PR to sprawl the web to “engage” people. Internally, companies are haphazardly trying various collaboration methods. We see a maturity process happening through 2009 that will force companies to look at all their collaboration points in a strategic way and tie them to business goals and processes. This new approach will transform them from toys to tools and will establish their place and value in the new order.

4) Mobility, Telecommuting and Virtual Meetings
After years of false starts and niche uses, technologies that untether the work force are racing forward at light speed. Wireless networks are becoming ubiquitous, devices are advancing rapidly, and an array of tools and technologies are making virtual meetings, collaboration and telecommuting a seamless proposition. Thirty-five percent of Baseline survey respondents said they’re expecting the use of these tools to increase in 2010.
BlackBerrys, iPhones, netbooks and a spate of other devices are reshaping the landscape. “Businesses are cutting costs and improving their productivity through mobility initiatives,” observes Dan Shey, mobile services practice director at ABI Research. However, at the same time, workers are demanding control over what devices they use and how they use them. “The consumerization of IT is in full swing,” adds Sean Ryan, mobile research analyst at IDC.
A bigger challenge for 2010 involves managing mobile devices and ensuring tight security, Ryan explains. Most organizations need to address these issues in a more comprehensive and holistic way—through better device administration technology and policies. In fact, telecommuting barriers have completely broken down due to the widespread and common use of mobile tools that work across platforms.

This connected and collaborative environment also promises to usher in better desktop video conferencing, along with more advanced telepresence capabilities. The widespread availability of high-bandwidth networks, along with more sophisticated and less-expensive technologies, makes it possible for organizations to work virtually and seamlessly. After years of hype, tools such as Skype, WebEx and Cisco TelePresence—along with widespread high-bandwidth connections—make cross-platform group connectivity and, in some cases, HD video an attractive and viable option.

5) Cloud computing…
has taken the business world by storm! Two-thirds of Baseline survey respondents plan to expand the use of public clouds, which reside on the Internet, provide access to shared computing resources and are operated by third-party providers. Sixty-four percent said they’re interested in private clouds, which, according to the National Institute of Standards and Technology, are “owned or leased by a single organization and operated solely for that organization.”
A growing number of organizations are turning to clouds to manage various applications, including basic word processing and spreadsheets through Google, CRM tools, ERP and databases. Indeed, most major enterprise application vendors have adapted their applications to run in the cloud—or they are planning to do so.
Organizations are also turning to clouds to keep mobile data in sync. Apple, Research in Motion and other vendors have simplified syncing contacts, e-mails, notes and calendar items across multiple devices.
Meanwhile, Amazon’s Elastic Compute Cloud (EC2) allows organizations to access resizable virtualized compute capacity across multiple operating systems, including Windows, Linux and Solaris. Microsoft recently introduced Windows Azure, a platform that lets developers create new Microsoft-compatible tools and applications in a cloud-based environment. And Unisys announced the Secure Private Cloud Solution, which optimizes storage virtualization and provides enhancements for internal data centers and business continuity.

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Let’s just say that the first automobile ever introduced to us post Horse and Buggy were cars that…

looked just like this. And they told us that we could get any color we wanted as long as it’s black. So then, we pickled a black one. We took family vacations in this car, drive to church in it and we would even just sit in it and listen to the ball game.

Then though it was over the years we did notice that every single car looked exactly like this one. A subtle difference here and there but for the most part, this was it

Let’s get it straight… the first car we ever see and use is a great looking BMW 6 series. As the years go by we end up with something that does the job but just isn’t something that we get excited about, certainly not something to show off and don’t ever use it anymore unless we absolutely have to go… somewhere that is. What happened? It made more sense for the manufacturers to spend less/charge more. Pretty clear cut and fast drying. Less material cost less money but the scam called “Inflation and Cost of Living” has converted everyone into a village idiot. The reality of a product and it’s worth is simple; it’s worth is only based on what someone is willing to pay. That’s it. You don’t want to pay $2.00 for a box of brownies then walk away. If you’re willing to pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for a Barry Bonds steroid home run baseball then good for you. You’re the top village idiot. That baseball is still a baseball. It hasn’t been filled with platinum, pure gold or even uncut whatever. It’s still a rawlings baseball. So now everyone is convinced about inflation, the increase in the costs of running a business, prices continue to skyrocket and though the companies all cut back the consumer still takes it in the rear end. Corporate has a free pass to extortionate pricing. The analogy above with the cars is this;

This one bathroom most people today will not remember. In fact, they will question if there ever were such a bathroom. Well the answer is yes and one with character, modern, luxurious and smart. Notice the commode is in a separate room adjoining the main bathroom. This should have never EVER changed. Use your imagination as to why. Here are a few more that we should have stayed with...

Oh this was certainly a waste of craftsmanship. Someone fire up the bulldozer pronto!

We should just take a torch to this nonsense. What could they have possibly been thinking???

So finally the idea strikes like a bolt of lightning…

It's magnificent! Who designed this? Frank Lloyd Wright? Barry Byrne? So this is what we have accepted for at least the past 50 yrs and we decided it ain't going to survive year 51. See what's coming...

the counter top-formica-granite-whatever sink becomes a beautiful craftsmanship piece of bedroom furniture. It has two sinks and all your drawer clothing is right there. Large enough fo two people. Space is large enough to comfortably get ready for any event. Check it out Jackson…

and it only gets better...

and better...

Now here in the bathroom there is all this additional room. You might be saying but I want a sink in the bathroom, I’ve always had a sink and I am… I interrupt and say ok, shut up you big crybaby and listen to me for a second. Over in this corner where you keep your dust decor…

handsome, compact,fit anywhere, any corner

you could install this one at the base of the tub

pay attention to the cabinet. This is where we go next

Moving on now leaving you with the classic pedestal

Next is a cabinet to store a few things in. Whatever they are. Could be condoms, k-Y, a waterproof vibrator, I don’t care. Just remember, the main vanity has moved into the bedroom. Now pay attention…

look at this, life was never this good

oh.yea-sex-toys-storage-cabinet

Freakin Awesome!

there.it.s-all.she.wrote.space.taken.with.pedestal.and.cabinet-4sqfeet

Now here is something I am very adamant about… shit stinks. Yours stinks even worse. Why they took the commode and stuck it in the the room with everything else still confuses me. There isn’t any amount of money that could be worth that. The toilet belongs and is going back to having it’s own room the size of a walk in closet. It will also accommodate a pedestal sink and medicine “wink-wink” cabinet. Check it out…

Very nice, very nice.

Si! Si!

Adequate. Serves the purpose

The alternative?

This was really Thomas Jefferson's toilet room. Good enough for him, it's good enough to bring back.

Coming tomorrow is the new look in the Loo with all the extra space. This room will become your sanctuary, your oasis, your getaway, you’ll become a bathroom rat. The designs are endless and you’ll love it once you start getting into it or call me for a consultation.

Taking a break from The FashionLoo for a minute to remember a bizarre and odd man that was emcee on a popular Sunday night variety show…

Mr Edward Vincent “Ed” Sullivan. Born: 9-28-1901 Died: 10-13-1974

Ed Sullivan was weird. No two ways about it. He always had his arms crossed very tightly like he was hanging on to himself, controlling beyond apprehension, possessing a sailor’s salty vocabulary and the only talent he did have was that of making his audience believe he was the nice “Uncle Eddie”. In reality though, Ed Sullivan had skipped college but earned a rough and tumble Ivy League education in American show business, from the speakeasy cabarets of his twenties to his abortive radio and film career to – especially – his years spent producing sawdust-and-sweat vaudeville shows. He was a loner, he would isolate, get pissed at someone about nothing and not speak to them for months, sometimes years. He would cancel performances on the day of the show if the performer would object to his change demands. opera star Maria Callas refused to sing her famed interpretation of Tosca, Sullivan had made it clear: you’ll sing what I tell you to sing or your performance is canceled. The diva had met a bigger diva. He told the Doors to change the word “Higher” in “light my fire”, they reluctantly agreed but sang the original lyric anyway. Ed canceled their next six scheduled shows and would not shake hands with them when they left. He told The Rolling Stones to change some lyrics in “Let’s spend the night together” and they agreed and kept their word. However, every time Mick sang the “new” lyrics he would roll his eyes. This pissed Ed off. It was definitely Ed’s show or no show. But watching him every week I remember not only was he odd and bizarre but he knew something that the rest of us didn’t. As nutty and stubborn as he was, he kept that show running for 25 years. A photo run down ES lane wrapping it up with his top 5 acts of all time.

Morrison, I warned you and you double crossed me! No one gets away with doing that to me. Your next six scheduled shows are all canceled! Now get off my stage and scram!

We already did the Ed Sullivan show

Ed clearly not getting through to the young Presley, he's quickly becoming annoyed and considering canceling his performance

Those hips of yours Presley will not shake about as you perform. Am I getting through to you yet you thick-headed hick?

Now you listen to me Parker or whoever you really are, get your whole gang in here, I'll kick their asses. Then when I'm done with them I'll knock the dog-snot out of your brainless mug. Then, after I am warmed up I'll use sissy girl Presley here as a punching bag. He'll be so banged up when I'm done with him it'll be at least a year before he can perform. And to make sure I am satisfied when I'm done, I'll keep the cash I promised you. Now am I getting through to you two hillbillies? No hips!!! Shut up Presley.

Topo Gigio finishes a song & dance number to a standing ovation on the Ed Sullivan show. Ed was so annoyed that a rat could be admired by all that he had to walk back stage to avoid embarrassing himself.

Because Topo was in such demand, particularly to appear on the Ed Sullivan Show, he was now enjoying being on top of the world. Ed on the other hand saw nothing but a rat when he looked at Topo. Topo sensed Ed's aversion towards him. Topo took pity on Ed and sent him a card...

Oh Eddie, you cana kissa my rat's ass!

Ed was outraged by this and immediately planned his revenge. He detested the fact that the audience adored Topo Gigio more than they adored Ed himself. On screen Ed was loving and kind to Topo. He would even kiss him goodnight. But now this was it. He wanted nothing more than to get rid of that rat. Rat poison he thought, slow and painful.

Wrapping up the shew with Ed Sullivan’s top 5 acts of all time. Starting with…

# 5~ The Rolling Stones

Hey Mick, maybe you shouldn't have rolled your eyes.

# 4~ Victor Borge (Isn’t he that funny guy who spins a million plates at once?)

# 3~ Topo Gigio

Ed thought he was clever sticking Topo in the number 3 spot. He proved he wouldn't hurt a little mouse and that Topo was his pal. But a twist takes place, Topo didn't trust Ed anymore so he brought his bodyguard along with him to the show...

A break in the countdown ladies and gentlemen…

Where's Sullivan. I gotta message for him from Topo Gigio.

Continuing with the shew as Mr. Bengal waits comfortably sedated in the green room, we now bring you the number 2 act of all time, The Beatles!

Number 2??? Who can possibly be 1?

And the number 1 act of all time… The Beach Boys!

This is America, we love Topo and The Beach Boys. Oh, oh... one thing about Ed Sullivan, he can smell when a mob is about to happen and this one is only moments away.

Everyone is booing Ed, Topo and his buddy the big cat are running towards Sullivan, Keith Richards of the Stones sucker punches Ed from behind, Victor tries spinning plates to calm the crowd but now they’re a mob charging the stage, Victor drops his plates screaming and running, Jim Morrison drops in and says to Ed, “you’re so stupid man” and then leaves. The Beatles are cracking up and The Beach Boys are crying. Ed throws his hands in the air and takes a walk back stage. Here is a rare photo of Ed at the end of that day…

You get to do it all over again next Sunday Ed. Keep your chin up!

R.I.P. Topo Gigio Born 8-22-1945 Died 10-12-1974.

That’s funny, Topo died a day before Ed Sullivan passed away… way to go Ed!

After Vintage we were on the way to creating what we now call the Retro Bathroom. Take a look…

Top 5 picks for the week o 12-07-2009. All Retro. Pick the most popular and win a prize~ I have never been a huge fan of this look primarily for two reasons; 1) They seem to be occupied by old people. Why? I have no idea. Just an observation on my part. 2) I forgot what my number 2 reason was but if I do remember before I’m finished I’ll let you know… They were not very sanitary! I knew I would remember. Some weird transition happened. You could eat off of the plumbing in a vintage Loo then the retro thing happens and I didn’t even want to be near one while eating. Seriously, they took my appetite away. Anyway, my top 5 picks “retro style” for week 12-07-2009-

Retro Loo pick # 5~

No space, incredibly small, it’s a germ motel… I hate it. 1 star.

Retro Loo pick # 4~

What is with the color pink? It seems like 8 out 10 retro bathrooms were pink back then. Is this because of Jayne Mansfield? There is something about the color pink that makes me want to vomit. No matter what shade it is I get a sudden urge to puke. I hate this Loo. 1 star!

Retro Loo pick # 3~

It’s getting better. I think the general population saw how disgusting their bathrooms had become so a change was in order. This next one at least makes an attempt to do something to get away from the crap that was being built and billed as “modern bathrooms” with all the comforts you can imagine… I would yell at the TV when I was a kid and tell the guy doing the commercial to go F–k himself then get up and go have a smoke I was so disgusted. But check this out…

Put your guns back in your holsters and calm down. Yea, it’s Pepto Dismal Pink BUT look at the gray towels above the toilet… huh? And then there’s some BS here and there that have normal colors for a man. Hey, just understand this if you’re thinking of ever running for office for any seat, change happens slowly. But it’s a positive change, God bless the guy who put these towels and thing-a-ma-jigs on the wall. This Loo gets 3 stars!

Retro Loo pick # 2~

The Loos are looking promising now. We’re heading in the right direction and everyone should light up a cigar and celebrate, Look at this beauty…

Ok, yea, it’s some kind of whacked out green but listen! It has more space, more colors though most of them suck with the exception of the floor tile which you have noticed is gray. A couple of aluminum shower rods, the commode is back in a separate room… we are on our way! I like it, 3 stars.

Now, the # 1 pick for the best retro Loo is…

Yea, that is right, stare in awe. This Loo is my favorite of all time. I got one word to say; I don’t see a spec of pink in this Loo, it’s masculine, it’s hip, slick and way too cool AND it’s Numero Uno in my Loo book! I am giving it, no, this Loo undisputedly deserves 5 stars. More if we had them. And let me tell you something, this ain’t no germ factory!

Back 2 Basics anyone?

Take a look at the things, stuff, electronics, picture frames, glass tops to counter tops. Microwave ovens to, George Foreman Grill to the Ron RONCO Rotisserie oven ~ “Set it and forget it” (they never mention what a royal pain in the rear end it is to clean that thing up. But it does cook a great piece of meat. Reel-to-Reel is still the best in quality but you can’t buy one. Beta should have easily beat out VHS but id not. Technology? Perhaps. Who moved faster, was more aggressive, got things going was who became the winner. It really didn’t have a thing to do with quality back then because ppl chose to buy VHS to record. It looked like crap but everything off of the TV set did then. Now it’s Blu-ray and HD-DVD over which format will become the dominant high-definition DVD platform. It’s a flip of the coin and who is the faster runner. So as you see things in your home that were brand new yesterday may be completely out of date today….. Wow my brain flatulated just then and I forgot where I was going with all this. I remembered and will tell you where, back to the basics as we should. I just read and article the other day on this upstart company that builds homes. Yea, big deal you’re thinking. The thing is these homes are ridiculously small somewhere around25 sq ft with a cozy (have ppl always noticed when the word cozy is used that the writer means cramped?) anyway, price tags for these one wheelers about 4 times the size of an outhouse is around 35k. Three br, 2 bath homes built in the 70’s were going for 25k – 30k. Inflation is definitely going to be the death of this country UNLESS we do go back to the basics and stick with them. I am relearning myself. I am fixing things rather than replacing. I am buying used instead of brand new. I ask the cashier at department stores if they have a coupon I can use. Most do. There are coupon books out there that serve the community from dining out to golf. Typically it’s a 2-for-1 deal which is great. So I came across this Loo and the first thing I thought of was Pitcher and Bowl. Now we obviously have better plumbing and such so it’s not entirely necessary to go back too far but back far enough where everything seemed much more peaceful, a simplicity to life, a relaxed hr or two in the sun drink a cold root beer. Take a look at the basin then look around your home. Try and find things that have given us a great advantage over some things but now how can we tone it down so that it is “greener”, better for the consumer, and the quality is unmatched. Send me your ideas. This could stimulate whole new workforce and this is a great thing!

When remodeling your home, the bathroom may take a backburner to all other areas of the house with the kitchen typically getting the most attention and budget. It isn’t that way anymore and it should never be that way again.

When remodeling your home, the bathroom may take a backburner to all other areas of the house with the kitchen typically getting the most attention and budget. It isn’t that way anymore and it should never be that way again. The bathroom is where you can let yourself slide into a calming peaceful zone. Let it be in the morning when getting ready for the stressors or at the end of the day after dealing with them. There is not a better place in the home than the bathroom. If you choose to ignore it, it will return the favor. If you decide that you will pay special attention to its decor and maintenance it will take care of you in the same way. They’re funny that way.

In memory of former President John F. Kennedy who was assassinated 46 years ago today.

Top 5 FashionLoo’s for the week of 11/22/09.

FashionLoo’s pick #5-

White-on-White has lost its WOW

Personally, white on white has been way overdone and quite frankly, it’s now beyond boring. When I see one I want to return to it with cans of rainbow colors, various shades of black and grey then just start throwing it in every which way direction to give it character. A personality. This Loo has that pasteurized look which is fine if you’re drinking milk. There is a difference between sterile and keeping it clean. Loo’s should be kept clean and hospitals should be sterile. Though I would never recommend w-on-w this one is ok. There are a couple of tones to it, the dark wood trim would have been way better off with a stone type of accent and the nauseating gold faucets should have been bronze antique with ivory buttons. (btw, is ivory ok to use or will it piss off Sr VP Dan Matthews of PETA to a point that he will crash my next show. Perhaps this time he’ll dress up as Alice from the Brady Bunch to fool security into letting him in. Dan, if you by chance read this let me know. I’ll change it to something that is fake Ivory) Moving on, gold accessories today are not happening. Think about it like this; you’re wearing a custom made designer suit that fits and hangs perfectly. It’s an awesome shade of grey that looks like a million bucks with a black shirt and black tie. For your wheels you put on a pair of white socks and sneakers. Don’t do it. The only time to use gold is when you’re exchanging it for cash. Also, they have a great towel rack but for their own reason(s) found it necessary to tuck it away in a far corner, out of sight and away from any kind of convenience. And why not showcase it anyway. There’s a lot of space here that with a different pair of glasses this Loo could be turned into a masterpiece with very little effort.

FashionLoo’s pick #4

Dead or Alive, Bamboo and Parrots belong outside

The above is our number 4 pick. I absolutely love this Loo. So some of you may be asking why I did not pick this as my number 1 pick for the week. I’ll tell you, the fake Parrots (Dan, I truly love any kind of animal. Well, my own personal cat is being punished right now because he really made a mess out of his Loo this morning. We wrapped all four of his paws in extra strength duck tape with the sticky side out. It slows him down after he’s done going insane. If this fails, a poke or two from a high voltage hotshot cattle prod never fails. It’s just amazing though how soon he forgets. I thought kittens were known for having excellent memories) and the bamboo shades have to go. This Loo is master work in the Spanish tradition that will never become boring or trite. Maybe someone can build a nice birdhouse from the bamboo, outside of course, and put the Parrots in there. This would be nice!

FashionLoo’s pick #3

This Brand is alive and will knock the Hilly-Bill snot out of you.

Where to begin with this one. First off, it’s manufactured by Eljer. The following is strictly my opinion and experiences with Eljer products. Others may have had better and more positive than mine were but it just wasn’t the case with me. Most of us have had the joy of fixing a leaky faucet. It’s great. You go to the hardware store, you talk to an employee and tell him things like brand, problem and what should you do. He/she starts you off with a couple of faucet seats, give you a few instructions (the whole time he’s talking you’re hoping you don’t screw this up) and that this should take care of it. You race home, start ripping the faucet apart when suddenly water is gushing like mad everywhere. You panic at first then crawl under the house to turn off the water main. All the while you could have just turned it off for this job under the sink. Ok, you’re back in the race, a bit bruised but that can even happen in softball. You begin pulling piece after piece out from the faucet handle and you’re beginning to wonder where the heck these seats, seals, washers, springs and why are there springs involved, your mind is racing when you finally come to two little dark circles/holes that look like the same size as your seats. Ok, pop them out, pop the new ones in. Easy enough. Pop! Pop! You’re becoming a genius. A master plumber! Gee, the new seats went right in. Great! Right about then you notice four springs sitting on the sink. The two you took out and the other two… Pop! Pop! Slide the springs into the seats and slide them into the holes… they won’t stay in though. Your cussing is increasing. After about an hr of this you decide the old springs still look pretty good and do what we do, switch. Hey, they slide right in and stay there. This is confirming you’re a master plumber with a creative mind. Now, you look over at all the pieces you took out and wonder how in the world did all those pieces fit under that faucet handle and why in the name of God didn’t you lay them down in order so you could just confidently put them back in starting with the last piece you pulled out. It’s been 7 hrs now and you are just snapping the cap on the faucet handle. There are no extra pieces lying around and you are certain you got each one in its appropriate place. You throw the handle up and… nothing! Not a drip. Not even any moisture. Wow, cuss words you didn’t know you knew. Then it hits you, you need to turn the water on. You run under the house, turn the main on and swagger back in to the sound of yet still nothing. You’re thinking though that perhaps you threw the handle down before going to the water main. Nope, up and down, up and down, up… you turned the water off from under the sink. Easy enough. You turn them both on, flip the faucet handle and water is coming out… from every possible way it can find an opening. Base, center ring, front of faucet handle, back of faucet handle… WTF!!! You turn it off from under the sink; you go in the other room and call a plumber. What should have taken 20 minutes and cost a buck or two is now going to go into day two costing $150. There are two rings inside the faucet that need to be adjusted to precisely together whenever the faucet is taken apart. This is usually a second or two of playing with. Now, you have two Eljer sinks, two Eljer toilets (try and get a handle that fits properly for one of these tanks. Plan on taking some vacation time from work) and two Eljer showers and tubs to go that all leak. You got a decision to make man. So it’s been three weeks and though you used two credit cards and are a few G’s in the hole, this new brand you bought and had installed works perfect! All this because of a couple of little rubber round things with a couple of minute slinky’s that were to go inside each one. Then to FIND Eljer replacement products is next to impossible. Look at the picture. THIS IS 1959 and I am certain we as a country had toilet paper available for purchase back then. No, this is one item that did not have to be made by Eljer. By the way, I was told no OEM available for Eljer replacement parts. This is nuts. Well, where the TP should be there is a towel ring and towel. That is about as much as I want to know about that. Maybe at one point in time this was a great product. If you have them and they work, keep them. If they are faulty and you were to ask me, replace with a new and different brand. Life is too short. We’re creating FashionLoo’s that people can relax in, enjoy, experience the comfort and ambiance of art, decor, sounds… this is what the bathroom was intended for.

FashionLoo’s pick #2

What can be said about this Loo that it isn't already saying.

This Loo says it all. Whatever it is that you need, want, must have, must do, anything at all that seems important will understandably have to take a seat in the other room while the Loo takes care of you. I could live in this room without hesitation. This Loo by far, is the most beautiful I have yet to see. Everyone should have at least one bathroom that will give them what this one can. The world would be in a much better place if this were possible. Now keep in mind, beauty, art, things we crave, our necessities to our pleasures in life be they big, be they small… they are constantly changing. And they should. This is what keeps our muscle beating that we call heart. Art and heart are synonymous. They correspond with one another, they are compatible and the two truly are one and the same. This is why we can go from this as being a masterpiece that can never be replaced to…

And the FashionLoo number 1 pick for this week is…

This Loo will build character and tell you story after story while giving you a lesson in how to be humble. From everyday that is on the calendar from past, there is a tale full of richness from happy beginnings to sad endings. From a simple idea turned brilliant, to a shattered broken old man who has nowhere to go, no one to go to, an unwed Mother of three, no job nor skills, no money supply, the runaway teen who spent the night, cold and shivering, full of fright. The doper the dealer hook this one for free, he\’ll be back and then he belongs to me. The abortions, the sick, a few stopped for rest, today is no different, than any other test. The pauper of pills, cleaned up for a job, but it all kicked in and all was long gone. Or, none of this happened, the owner of the service station was a drunk and never bothered to clean the restroom. Those who dared to open the door found the smell so wretched that they turned to the desert willing to take their chances with rattlesnakes.

Bonus; Success begets Success…

FashionLoo, our original store still operating strong thanks to our faithful clients!

Success seems to follow us no matter what we do. As a result we have opened our second store, FashionLoo-Two. This store will focus mostly on high end accessories with a European influence. FashionLoo-Two will function as a showroom only. All orders will first be sent directly to the showroom for our thorough inspection within 24 hrs of arrival. After inspection clears item then can be shipped directly to you via UPS (additional fee depending on size/weight of item), delivered directly to your home by FashionLoo-Two (additional fee depending on size and weight of item) or you may schedule a day when you would like to come in and pick up (no charge). Any item left at showroom for more than 30 days will be sold at our retail store for full retail price. Original customer will not receive a refund of any type which includes selecting an item of equal value. These customers ordering anything for a second time will still pay for item in full at time of ordering. In addition to this a processing fee of 50% cost of item will be required and is non-refundable if item is not picked up. If item is picked up within 30 days the processing fee only will be returned in full. If you do not agree with any part of the aforementioned policy then by all means, please take your business to a chain store. Chain stores have a no questions asked 100% return policy that often gets repeated business. Maybe it’s just me but I wonder if there is a difference in quality between China and Europe. Just curious. Anyway, thank you for stopping by and we’re looking forward to seeing you again soon at FashionLoo-Two!

Two other recently finished FashionLoos

Both of these bathrooms had some water damage but not bad. Everything was salvageable. The stripping of the wallpaper was tedious and unforgiving with ongoing dust storms. For anyone who suffers from allergies no matter what protective gear you wear this will get to you. The second challenge was though the floors were solid they were “wavy” which took a lot of elbow work to get them even. A big hammer also helped when everything else either failed or became increasingly frustrating. If you look closely at a lot of the wall-hangings, metal pots, soap dishes, some pictures… these were all purchased at various Goodwill’s. The imagination will go along way once it’s encouraged and charged up! They’re great for holding hand-towels, facecloths, soaps, creams and anything else you can thing of.

The wood is original and in pretty fair shape after a lot of muscle beating the hell out of it. The linoleum was glued down with cement. When separating these two I discovered I know a lot of ways to express myself with words that I never knew I had in me. And for the life of me I can't remember what those words are. I bet someone else does though.


The end result of the floor for Loo #1. I really like the way it turned out.

Bathroom #2 is interesting. Almost identical to #1 in the beginning but went in a totally different direction with colors. Dolphin gray walls, Nordic gray baseboards, molding is specs of creams, browns and white. Floor is black, white and gray. Lots of metal in this Loo and though the colors are dark it is extremely calming in this room.

In the early beginning stages of a project everything seems like it will be so much fun. After about 3 minutes into it is when the truth is told.


The end result…

This is the end results for the floor. It is beautiful. The colors are dark throughout that somehow pull off a very warm and comforting feeling. It is quite elegant.

Beautiful lighting that I pieced together

Overall these two FashionLoos were great fun to design. To watch the transformation from basic and functional hum-drum, get ready for the rat race room to #1 becoming artsy, trendy, fashionable that looks like it belongs in a leading ad agency was a lot of fun and exciting. I love the way this Loo turned out.

Before

After

FashionLoo #2 was anyone’s guess with this window that you’ll see. What do we do with it? Surrounded by wallpaper and a couple of decorative items including a roll of tape, we decided to put our imagination to work around the window and not so much on the window. When we finished with this it was alive. It belonged to the original Rat Pack! It says; “Hey, look at me now” when you walk into the Loo. It knows your name, shines a light on you and will even contest what you are wearing is all wrong for what you’re doing that night; “You’re not REALLY going out in that TONIGHT… are you???” I can also smash it to kingdom come, take away its 8 corners and make a circle out of it if it keeps it up. So far, all corners are intact.

Next is a Plasma TV in The Loo

FashionLoo #2 was a hit or miss going with the dark colors. It could have turned out dreary, doom & gloom and would have then been referred to as a gas station restroom that you operate with your feet. It didn’t though. It didn’t even come close to something of that nauseating look. On the contrary, it converted to an imaginative, artistic and intelligent Loo that would impress any prominent Manhattanite without explanation.

The best for last… Loo number one turned out awesome. Picture perfect. Always finding just the right bucket, soap-dish, antique metal wall hanging and every single time the price was rock bottom and the color(s) perfect for the Loo. We were missing something though. One of those things that you’re not quite sure what it is but you will know it emphatically when you see it. Then, right before our eyes while walking past a taxidermist’s office was Jaz Cat. a.k.a. M.C. CoCo Kat This cat was put together so well he looks totally real! Put your cursor an inch or two above his head, he’ll stare at it for days, even a week one time. Even his colors match the Loo. You have to admit, with this find you know it’s one of those days when everything you touch is going to turn to gold. Now, introducing Jaz Cat at The Loo…

From the tip of his nose to the very end of his tail, Jaz Cat packs them at The Loo!

The Top 5 Picks for the Week of 11/16/09

That time of week again. In a few hours everyone who is sound asleep (everyone with JOBS that is) Man, how did this economy get so bad??? I thought I should start being more frugal and participate in shopping smart, do not waste, buy only what I need to survive on like tree bark and water so I decided I would shop at the 99 cent store for some basic home supplies. Every item in the store was over a $1.00. I left without buying anything. Then I came up with a brilliant idea… I went to all the fast food restaurants and grabbed condiments for the house. This is going to save us a bundle I thought. Next I went to every high end restaurant I could find and took the matches for heat and mints by the pocket loads for snacks while watching TV at home. I’m beginning to think this isn’t so bad. Tomorrow I have plans to rob the food bank. I’m going in disguised as a drunk, angry, enough is enough Dan Matthews/VP of PETA with a loaded squirt gun. I’m hoping that everyone will pass out from shock instead of beating the living dog-snot out of me which is highly likely and understanding. I may even look the other way. Anyway, an update will be in next weeks top 5 picks. Meanwhile, here at the ranch, we’ve cut back so much My cat bit me for no reason at all last night. Well actually, he is always biting me. BUT this time he drew blood and he means business. He wants the top of the line IAMS. I explained that the IAMS offer to animals is; “you’re either IN or you’re OUT” Think about it, not funny. This will make you laugh though, how ridiculous the economy has gotten. I read several articles that recently that the worst crime in Asheville, NC is throwing stones at homes. That’s the worst crime. I mean if you were walking by a window and a rock came flying through I suppose that would be bad. Still, the worst crime is throwing stones at homes. AND it happens often. Now in LA you can sell pot for medicinal purposes, beat the living daylights out of someone and claim it was “mutual combat”. You will get a small fine and that is the end of that. The prisons in Asheville NC though are overcrowded with “home stoned throwers” forced to hard labor. In LA Mass murderers have computers and color TV’S. Let’s jaw on this for a second, I can hopefully and God willing get a job at the infamous Walmart to supplement my income for the upcoming holidays. Thanksgiving we’re having chicken and that’s that. Chanukah we’re having kosher spam for 8 days starting on December 11th and continuing through December 19th and that’s that. On Christmas we’ll order Chinese food and that’s that. Now, I have no idea if Walmart even pay their employees with real money, offer them any sort of benefits (but man, Globalization: Walmart is keeping China busy) Or I could sell crack part time, a few hrs a day. Starting off I would make right around $400k. Can I sleep on it tonight and give you an answer in the morning? Oh by the way, do I get an employee discount? No, not at Walmart dummy, for the crack!”

Moving to The Top 5 picks for this rat race week of 11/16/2009…

# 5~ Loo

bathroom-most-beautiful-peptobismol

I wasn't feeling well the other day so I went to the Loo and painted it PeptoBismol.

# 4~ Loo

bathroom_remodel_green_cream

Pepto didn't help much so I went for the mint...

# 3~ Loo

bathroom-wall-art-accessories-II

Anyone notice that the European Loo's all have chandeliers. I'm starting a reFashion on a small guest Loo tomorrow, actually in a few hours, and I will suggest they have a chandelier installed. Gotta upsell during tough times!

# 2~ Loo

bathroom-hers-charming-2009

This beautiful classic look is one that is in most demand to reFashion today.

The number 1 FashionLoo for week 11/16/2997 is…
Everything can be done in one room. Dad reads the paper with a martini (4th one by the way) Mom is bathing Jimmy the greek, all three older sisters don’t want to be near you and Mama looks tired, Pops passed out and my sisters are smoking cigarettes in the house. This is insane for a 9 year old!

Have a great week, check back often and stay in shape. You never know who you may run into…

rats-ass

Sort of reminds me of A-Rod 😉

Nothing can be more humbling ~ everyone should be so lucky.

We’re visual people. Probably 90% of us only see what is in front of us. And what is in front of us is not the full story. Perhaps it is just a symptom, maybe a chapter, could be a back-up player or even a stunt double. It could just be a moment of nothing that you will never know why but it served you well. That one should make you think for a second. Maybe all those delays that seem like a complete waste of your precious time and are even more annoying may actually be a divine intervention that is saving your life. Ever take a wrong turn that set you back 20 minutes? Frustrating, even maddening at times but not the end of the world. So what “if” you had not taken a wrong turn and were right on schedule. 6 miles down the road from where you might have taken the wrong turn you’re instead T-Boned by some idiot who ran a red light. That driver has a bruised forearm, coughing a bit because of the dust from the airbag has managed to get out of his wreck, which happens to be totaled, on his own. Meanwhile, you’re not moving and you can’t feel a thing from your neck down. You’re hoping, praying to God that it isn’t what you think it is. You’re too young, you have children who need a dad, someone they can always lean on, you have a wife that loves you and cares about you, she’s interested in everything about you… until now. You cuss and damn the world. Could be that what we see is not what it is all. It’s what we don’t see, what we don’t know happens to be the truth. Let’s take a look…

bathroom-however-many-times-the-water-ran

Everytime this water ran, there was a wearisome look, a hole in a sole or even a soul, a dollar short... again. A tear of loneliness falls, becoming all too familiar. a deep breath and a sigh, dirty beads of sweat, wearing dust from the road, a man so broken, broken in every way, used every time, when this water flowed. It had no agenda, no hidden flaws, the dirt and the filth, is more than just that, by the man that walks before you. Receiving the dirt, receiving the grime, yet still willing to give the one thing it has, that being of water, essential to life. Like the tattered lonely man, who appears a bit crazed, diseased with no cure, can't look you in the eye, he knows you're response, you'll look away. His dignity a memory, his hope is as well, his spirit lay somewhere, broken up by you. This tattered old man who once had a Mother, a Father he loved, had friends who admired him, then one day, they all damned him to hell. Now all in the past but a memory or two, he's paltry and pitiful, no home nor coin, his only need is his only pleasure, refreshing cool water, that this story old sink offers the treasure, will give and give and never question why. The shabby old timer, stares at the rusted old basin, the dirt and the grime, the faucet then rim. He knows the story, it's a story about him.

The Top 5 Picks for the Week of 11/9/09

This was an odd week for us. Lots of jobs were wrapping up, everyone seemed happy with the results and did you see how big the moon had been last week? It was full, bright orange and it looked like it was so close we could travel there by plane. Well, you could, I can’t. I can’t fly overseas and I am going to fly to the moon? Overseas, ha, if I fly x-country I am having severe anxiety and need lots of… moving along, we saw some really interesting ideas that I put on the site here and there. I surprised our cat the other day when I walked into the kitchen. She is of the neurotic kind so as one would suspect when the whacked are surprised… she took off in full force, her feet moving faster than the Looney Tunes Tasmanian Devil himself AND in the direction away from the door. 10 short feet in front of her was nothing but wall and she’s picking up speed per foot as her fat body is catching up with her feet. I’m standing there thinking that this is not only going to be good but it will be the highlight of my day. Inches from the wall now my anxiety starts getting in gear. She doesn’t miss a note and flys up the wall hissing and I let out this; “Oh my God! She’s actually running up the wall” Well gravity was about to win this battle before she crashed into the ceiling which I did want to see. She somehow flipped her body around as she’s making a u-turn. Not only is she going as fast as a cheetah now with a hiss that would scare a rattle snake there’s a weird odor coming from her that scared me so I jumped out of her way. I didn’t see “Taz” for about 8 hours after that. I thought how odd, she is still out of breath. For some reason it reminds me of the many times I have fallen in the gutter. I would just lay there and stare at the stars. I never knew if it were the beauty of the stars in the sky or the fall itself that took my breath away.
Here are the top 5 Loo picks for this week. Enjoy. Remember, if you’ve looked for hours on end and still can’t find your glasses just forget about it. You’ll find them when you take them off.

# 5~

bathroom-1920-quality

I have just one word for this Loo- everything about it has superior quality right down to the smallest detail. It's beautiful!

# 4~

bathroom-french-question

Ok, this Loo was designed in France. I have been trying to figure this out. Does this person have a Loo in his office or is his home bathroom where his office is. Anyone?

# 3~

bathroom-unusual-creative-I-like-it

The mirror acts as an illusion, I thought it was a door

# 2~

bathroom-superior-quality

May not have the comfort you like but this is superior quality!

And the # 1 Loo for this week…

bathroom-the-best-days-r-behind-us

Not to have worries, what a great place to be!

If the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence that is because the cows have already been there.

Have a great week and check back often!

g. max shapiro
maxshapiro.ca@gmail.com
828-676-0803
Call/email for a free, no obligation consultation